Before I say anything else, I need to write a retraction from my Happy Thanksgiving post. My father pointed out to me that my nephew, Nate, graduated from the University of Oregon, not Oregon State University. My apologies to Nate and to any Ducks fans out there!
Yesterday, I invited you to send me a note about what you are thankful for this year. A couple of you responded and, if it’s okay with you, I wanted to share:
I am so thankful for God’s provision for me as a widow – He promised to be my husband and of course He is perfect. I am thankful for peace every day and how He provides financially and in every way.
I’m thankful that God allowed our paths to cross!! Have a blessed day! [I’m glad we met, too, Betty!]
I am thankful for a conversation my family had after the feast today. This was probably the most real discussion we’ve had as a family in our entire lives. For the first time I can ever remember, nearly every member of the family opened up about the empty areas in our lives and what we have been learning about God in that emptiness.
A lot of the discussion came from 66 Love Letters by Dr. Larry Crabb. As my sister, Lauryn, put it, God built us for relationship with Him, and He is the only One that can fill that space. We try to fill the hole with “second things” that never seem to quite satisfy. Either they don’t last or they aren’t what we hoped they’d be.
As I have been reading this book, I have finally come to terms with the fact that most of the problems I’ve had in my life, I’ve brought on myself. I have had God send red flags up which I’ve ignored, and I have suffered consequences for my decisions. Up until lately, I blamed God for what happened, and now I realize He’s the innocent party. I have tried to manage my own life as though God couldn’t possibly manage it without my help. I have been so desirous of having things go my way that I have taken the control out of His hands. God has stepped back and let me flounder on my own like a two-year-old saying “I can do it myself!” until I turn to Him and hold up the broken pieces and say, “Fix it, Daddy!” I am tired of breaking everything I touch. I am tired of sitting on the throne of my life. I don’t completely understand yet how to turn the throne over to God for keeps, but I know that He must increase and I must decrease. (Jn 3:30)