This morning we had a visit from the hospice social worker. She asked Dad some questions about his life and his career, and she asked him how he is feeling emotionally right now. Dad said he’s at peace about this.

Then she asked Elaine and me if we had any questions and we had lots of questions for her. She said that we will probably be getting a lot of calls from hospice this week as the hospice nurse and the hospice chaplain want to meet with Dad too. After this week, their visits will be spaced out for 2 or 3 weeks, to begin with, but as the needs grow greater, we will probably be seeing them more often.

Dad sat up almost all day and he ate regular servings of food. He walked with his walker several times and sat at the dining room table to eat. He watched Jimmy Swaggert all afternoon and evening. He, Elaine, and I had some good discussions today. If it hadn’t been for the help Dad needed in getting up and down, it would almost have felt like a normal day. Elaine was saying that she hoped the diagnosis of Acute Myeloid Leukemia was wrong and that Dad will live to be 100. I am trying to figure out which stage of grief that is. Is it denial? Bargaining?

One thing the social worker made plain to me today is that whatever Dad wants, he can have, and as far as medical decisions are concerned, as long as Elaine is alive, she is the lead decision-maker. If anything happened to Elaine, I would be the second choice for medical decisions, but since Elaine is fully capable, I am here to help, not to take charge. I was thinking about that today and realized that I have always had a problem with sticking my nose in where it’s not needed in an effort to “help”. The verse that came to mind is, “The greatest among you shall be your servant.” (Matthew 23:11) I am here to serve, not to take over. I need to reign myself in!